Bah Humbug - It's December again! 18 days to go!

Wednesday, 7th December. What? I've just missed a whole week of December? And still, no Christmas cards written. This is rather embarrassing, as I have not even made new ones this year. So, I shall have to climb up into my cupboard-that-holds-things-I-seldom-need,-but-need-anyway, and extract the box of Christmas stuff.

Too bad, if I send the same card design to someone for a second year. At least it demonstrates consistency on my part, and a modicum of austerity - along the lines of no new designs, no extra monetary outlay, using up stock from already written-off capital.

So, the choice is ...

Christmas letters:

Complete with an alphabet of rhyme - what more could you want for Christmas?

The Twelve Veg of Christmas:

That one comes complete with a veggie rhyme, set to a well-known Christmas Song. What could be healthier than that?

Eric and Bert, in the snow:

And not a volcanic eruption in sight ... sort of ...

Or an angel looking cute:

I fear, though, family reprisals, if I send them any of these again.

Bah flipping Humbug, now I shall have to go out and purchase cards ....

Of course, it is a tad late now, but maybe for next year. All the cards are available on my Etsy store.

Bah Humbug - It's December again! 19 days to go!

Tuesday 6th December. And, I still haven't written a single Christmas card.

I think I must have felt extremely grumpy this morning. I lined up Are You Grumpy Santa? to read with my primary student in the afternoon.

She was not overly impressed.

She had not chosen this book last week. But then again, I believe I omitted to give her the option.

So, she was not overly impressed, until she opened the book and saw Santa fall out of bed, have a cold shower, the elves shrink his best Santa suit in the dryer - so he had to wear the itchy woolly one, and then his reindeer got snowed under.

The mood changed.

Amazing how the excitement and magic of Christmas permeate young children and infects adults. I think I had forgotten, what with my Austerity- and Alt-Christmas trees, and two teenage boys.


Nevertheless, I could not quite get the image of an itchy, woollen Santa suit out of my head for the rest of the day, and became sympathetically Bah flipping Humbug itchy myself.

Think I need some more exercise.

Bah Humbug - It's December again! 20 days to go!

Monday, 5th December - Austerity Star Date - Go to Ikea for some Scandinavian therapy.

If the truth be known, I was beginning to find myself feeling a little nostalgic for those Christmases when the house was filled with decorations and lights, and the fat feathered fairy that sat on top of the tiny fake tree that my mother liked to place on the table in the hallway. My face used to flush tomato-red when I caught sight of her bare butt. The feathers were not very efficient at covering her modesty.

On the spur of the moment, I filled a water bottle, picked up my car keys and took my life in my hands - I was going to that winter wonderland of flat-packed furniture, Ikea.

I was not sure quite what for, though. Gosh, maybe I was becoming engulfed by the consumerism that I was so desperately attempting to humbug?

After speeding through the meandering walkways of the store, which is obviously trying to make you buy more, by packing more into a smaller space. I whirl-winded along the woodland paths that entice unsuspecting customers to the gingerbread house. I found some solar energy lights - that'll save the planet, and a set of tree lights that was one-sixth the price of lights I had seen in Tanglin Mall. More about The Great Christmas Fairy Light Rip Off in a future blog ...

Then I found what I was looking for - white willow sticks. Perfect for my pagan tree corner. Now all I needed were some tiny lights, and some Nordic Christmas baubles, and I would have an alternative tree - the Alt-Christmas Tree - with no needle shredding. I had the have an alternative tree, after all, this is a Christmas of trends, started with my austerity tree.

Tiny, almost inconspicuously wired, battery operated fairy lights were the answer, which proved their novelty by turning themselves off after a certain length of time. I reckon they gave up when no one was watching. Well, at least that saves on the battery purchase.



With my purchases in hand, or in a couple of large reusable bags, I headed home to establish my Alt-Christmas corner, feeling rather Bah flipping Humbugly pleased with myself.

Bah Humbug - It's December again! 21 days to go!

Oh goodness, it's Sunday. I have the tedious task of adorning the tree with trinkets and baubles.

"Ah, but ..." the sneaky little Bah Humbug fairy whispers in my ear, "it's an austerity tree, isn't it?"

"What's that got to do with whether it snows or not this year?" I think I must have been having a conversation with myself.

"Well, it's hardly going to snow in Singapore, now, is it?" chided the Bah Humbug winged thing.

"It might do, if you go to look at the lights at Tanglin Mall." I suggested to myself. Then, I remembered, quite proudly, that in all the years I have lived in Singapore, I have never bothered to venture under the Christmas decorations at Tanglin Mall, with the hope of being soaked in sticky, foamy bubbles.

And now my boys are too old to want to associate themselves with anything like that.

Goodness me, what have I raised?

"Back to the point at hand," grumbled the Bah Humbug bug. Definitely a bug, only a bug would keep reminding me to rummage around in the bomb shelter, hope I didn't discover a dead cockroad, and carry up boxes of Christmas decorations that had amassed over the years.

"Now that's a point for austerity," I ventured.

The bug shook its head, "no one will buy second hand Christmas ornaments - don't kid yourself."

I resigned myself to selecting decorations that were befitting a short, austerity tree.


I think I managed to pull off a fairly decent feat of decorating - using up almost as many trinkets on the tree as a normal year.

Well, OK, not a normal year.

But a year when I have had a taller and wider tree (probably been eating too many mince pies).



So, Miss Nit-picky Bah Humbug Fairy, you can go and Bah-flipping-Humbug off.

Bah Humbug! - It's December AGAIN - 22 more days to go

Twenty-two days to go. No choice. I have to put the Christmas tree up.

I have put it off long enough.

The box was small, and it felt rather lightweight. What had I ordered? I knew I should have ordered the 6ft tree. But then, it might have been really wide. The five foot one, from the box, looks like it might have been subject to some austerity cuts. I suppose I did rather propose a Scrooge-led Christmas.

Having erected the tree,  I stood back to admire it. My, was it short.

Nothing for it.

I would have to cheat. So out came the leather packing case. Out came a large slab of cardboard. Out came a Christmas-looking table cloth. Suddenly the tree was a foot taller. I had a 6ft Christmas tree for the price of a 5ft. Definitely in keeping with getting more for less.

Next the lights. I refuse to purchase new lights, unless of course all of them are liable to electrocute me. This year, only one set decided to embark on some mad random frenzy and take no notice of how many times I pushed the stupid button.

I wondered whether Scrooge would have thrown them out or bypassed the control box. Now that's an idea.

The tree being someone smaller than I had anticipated, only required two strands of fairy lights this year - definitely an austerity tree.

So, there we are - savings all round.

Smaller tree = less capital outlay
Smaller tree = fewer branches = less fairy lights = less opex.



I could go into business, offering Austerity Christmas Decorating services.

The only downside with that - I suspect, given that this involves austerity, I am not sure how many paying customers I would actually attract.

And so, once again, before I decorate the tree, I am reduced to a glum Bah, flipping, Humbug.

Bah Humbug! - It's December - AGAIN! 23 Days to go

And so we enter the second day of Advent.

I managed to go for a walk today. And I avoided the Christmas Muzak. However, I did not avoid having a fight with a load of tinsel that was strewn over the floor outside a building. The debate was whether to gather it up and do something with it, or mutter something about surplus population and waste of money. I picked it up and placed it out of the way of trampling feet.

Rather Christmas spirited of me.

Which reminds me, if the price of Champagne in the supermarkets insists on being so stupidly expensive, then it will be a Prosecco Christmas. But oh, yes, didn't Boris mention something about more expensive Prosecco? Or was that in the UK? Well, whatever, I think it will have to be a Scrooge-led Christmas this year.

Bubbles out of the way, I prepared Stave 3 of Charles Dicken's masterpiece - A Christmas Carol to work on with my Friday afternoon pupil. There is a tenuous link in here somewhere about the tinsel and surplus population.

Today is going to be the Ghost of Christmas Present. Except he doesn't bring any presents, just want and ignorance.

And why wasn't this version available when I asked my pupil to watch the movie?

Oh, Bah, flipping Humbug. Only two days down and how many more to go?

Bah Humbug - It's December Again - 24 Days to go

Yet another Christmas, yet another month of having to turn the music up and risk damaging my ears so I can avoid damaging them from too much cheesy Christmas music.

I swear Christmas music is going from bad to worse. We're now subjected to muzak versions of Christmas songs, as if we're stuck in some elevator in an old Blues Brother's film.

Well, I suppose it is a slight change from Elton John, ABBA and The Carpenters that seems to permeate the supermarket aisles.

I haven't managed to get my head around putting up the Christmas tree yet. I had no time this year, so I purchased one online. It arrived in a box. But it looks rather midget to me. 

And here is a link to some of the painful stuff I am trying to protect my ears from ...

Bah flipping Humbug to everyone!